Soul Stitching
by Sunfreak
Summary: Kai gives his mirror an inspection and does some repair work on his psyche. Slight shounen ai.
1. Soul Stitching

A/N: Lots of metaphors ahead. Enjoy the obscurity and see if you can't figure out who's who. ^_^ Oh, c'mon, it's me- you know what couple I write. For a full-blown analysis, see the next installment. You may need it.  
  
Kai's POV.  
  
  
  
"Soul Stitching"  
  
  
  
I pull my soul out of my pocket and take a good look at it. It's a relatively healthy one- not stained or scorched, though a little tattered in some places, and maybe with a bit of dirt on it, especially around the hands. Nothing irreparable, but hey, I'm still young. I can damn myself anytime I like.  
  
First though, I'd better wash it. My soap is almost untouched; I use it very rarely. I always thought I could keep my soul clean without any help, but that soap and four turns in the washer do wonders. The dryer's harder to deal with- sometimes I worry it'll rip apart in there.  
  
I whip out my needle and thread and do my best to darn up the bigger holes, though I'm clumsy at it and prick myself often. I'm not used to repairing such things. Still, I plow on, because there's no point in giving up a thing once you've started in on it, and after a long time, it's more or less back to its original condition, though some of my thread is the wrong color and has left scars. Maybe I'll dye it later, but I don't think so. Scars show you've lived, and it's an empty person who has none.  
  
A last inspection, and I take my scissors to the chest. The soul's thickest there, but my scissors are very sharp, and I manage to hack my way through without too much difficulty. The next layer is weak, soft cotton, and I easily push it aside.  
  
It's the third layer that presents the real problem.  
  
Hard, cold ice greets me, its dull gleam hiding the one and only thing that I seek. I have neither matches nor a lighter, nor anything at all which I might melt it with, but I scratch at the surface for a moment or two anyway, feeling rather helpless. Touching it makes me cold, though, so I have to pull away and wrap my hands in my scarf.  
  
I glare at the ice for a long moment, then decide that this is really quite enough fooling around and bring my lips to it. After all, I have things to do. A single kiss, and it melts even as my lips freeze. I shiver but wait patiently for the frost to all fall away.  
  
The next layer is weakest of all- just a few scraps of fragile tissue paper soaked through by the melting ice; there more for the semblance of resistance than anything, and in my eagerness I tear it away as quickly as I can with my still-numb fingers.  
  
And when I finally get to the heart, I find you there, smiling at me with your cat-slit eyes, and your kiss is enough to warm up anything- even me.  
  
  
  
* ende *  
  
  
  
. : review or the bishounen gets it! : . 


	2. Story Analysis

Author's Notes: Analysis of "Soul Stitching."  
  
  
  
"Soul Stitching" deals with the idea of the soul being a corporeal thing, depending on how you view yourself. In the storyline, Kai sees himself as a harsh, unyielding cloth on the surface- most likely something like canvas, which is both durable and long-lasting and used for various things involved in traveling, like sails, certain styles of travelers' pants, and backpacks. This suggests that Kai has no particularly strong connection to either his birthplace or the people there and not much in the way of a family life.  
  
When Kai mentions that his soul is tattered, it's referring to past sins- the selfish things that he regrets doing. The dirt is symbolic of his solitary nature, focused around the hands because of his obsession with Beyblading. The more that he feels that he needs no one, the "dirtier" or rather, the colder, his soul appears and the more it keeps others from wanting to know him better upon seeing its grungy appearance- something like a self-defense reflex. Referring to damning himself whenever he wants to, Kai's just saying that he's still young and can change himself into someone better or worse, depending on what he decides to do.  
  
Though Kai says he is "washing" his soul, in reality he is letting down his defenses and letting people start getting closer to him. The untouched detergent represents his original unwillingness to enter into such relationships, and the washer is what wears away at his cold exterior- one turn for each member of the Bladebreakers. The dryer is the emotional pain he is also opening himself up to, and the fear of tearing the fear of betrayal.  
  
Sewing up the worst tears in his soul represents Kai's redemption of his more grievous errors and the repairing of relationships he's damaged, though even the most careful stitching can't hide some marks. He keeps sewing despite difficulty and being unused to such labors because life is difficult no matter what you do, and it only makes sense to at least go the way that will get you the things that you desire. The refusal to dye it is also the refusal to hide his true self or glorify himself beyond what he really is.  
  
Cutting into the chest is the beginning of the search for his heart and the person he cares for the most. The first layer is canvas, and though hard to get through, it's possible with patience. Inside is only cotton stuffing and Kai's weaker parts, easily ripped through. But next is the ice, which Kai cannot melt with the things he carries with him. His scarf briefly becomes a way to hide from the seriousness of what he is about to do, and only his kiss can break through the frost, because it symbolizes his true emotions and his desire to become a real person. Still, he must be patient and undergo some pain for it.  
  
The final layer is only tissue- a token resistance if anything, only there so Kai can claim he isn't giving up. As soon as he pushes it aside, he finds what he has been searching for- the person in his heart with the cat-slit eyes, Rei, who loves him and whom he loves in return.  
  
  
  
* ende *  
  
  
  
. : did j00 review yet? : . 


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